oh heeeeey!!

Been a freaking long time!! So long.....that we have actually added another tiny human to our crew. Peyton was born in October and is almost 7 months! What???????  Kaylee is finishing 4th grade. And my little Jaxon is getting ready for kindergarten!! Everyday school! Holla!!!!!!!  Then just me and baby have a few hours alone 5 days a week!  What will we do you ask???? Im hoping for a nap from time to time. ( like when I was a mom of 1).
 My little family has not been the only ones expanding!  Both yes,BOTH of my little sisters got married this last yr. It was a busy year for everyone to say the least.  Britt married Joe in August.  It was such a beautiful wedding with party hardy dancing at the end!! And there was this very pregnant mama keeping up with the beat and not going into labor!! ( she's awesome ;)).  Aubri got married to Bryce before Christmas.  Her wedding was beautiful and cold!! Good thing there was yummy hot soup and another awesome dance party to keep you warm. one things for sure, Poulsens can throw a party!!!!!!  And GOOD NEWS!! I could dance the night away because I wasn't pregnant at this wedding! Thank goodness.  I just have to say that my sisters chose the best men to be their husbands!! I sleep well knowing they are being loved and protected by these amazing guys. 
So, the yr ended pretty good. I was hopeful for a fairly calm new yr.  That was not in the plans.  My beautiful 12 yr old niece was diagnosed with leukemia at the end of January.  Rough start to the new yr is an understatement.  Here we are in April and she is doing great!! Currently cancer free!! Starting another round of chemo to get ready for bone marrow transplant.  We have witnessed many miracles and tender mercies through this process. And for that I am grateful. I may not understand Gods plan and why people have to suffer such great trials.....but I do understand Gods unwavering love for each of us.  Never has this been more apparent to me.  This last week I had my own trial of my faith.  Last Friday I woke to find my Baby Peyton having seizure!! Worst 40 or so seconds of my life!!  Not knowing how to help your child is absolutely the worst feeling I have ever experienced.  I have never had to call 911 for my self. Always someone else.  to call for help for my child was something I hope to never experience ever again.  I am thankful for the woman on the other end of the phone who stayed with me till help arrived..  The paramedics were an amazing group of men!!! Soo professional and compassionate.  I was less fearful with them in my home.. Also, my brother in law Matt came over and gave Peyton a priesthood blessing.  I believe in the power of those blessing and cling to the words for strength!  Doctors at primary's are wonderful doctors.  We are so blessed to have such an awesome hospital right in our own back yard!  Hope to never visit there too often in my life though!  Peyton has been cleared by a neurologist and I am trying to relax and put the images of that morning out of my mind.  I am trying to get back to our normal.  Trying to be worthy of the blessings that My Father in heaven has given us.  Here is to a better year!! . . . . .   So, this was written a month ago, alot gas gone on.  For example.....today Peyton had another seizure. :(. Most likely caused by another ear infection and Spike in temperature.  The neurologist said it would most likely happen again the last time she had one. But I didn't want to believe her.  She said if it ever happened again and if I felt panic to call 911.  ( of course moms don't panic, said NO one EVER). Well , during lunch Peyton did it again. :(. So of course we called 911. Paramedics arrived and said its totally normal.....sent us to primary's and again was told it was normal and that she would most likely grow out of them.  So how am I doing you ask?  Not sure really.  Kinda ticked off if you want to know the truth.   I guess it really could be worse. I know other family's and their children are dealing with alot worse.  Now I guess I got to chill out, remember the peace that comes from heavenly father. And let him help and protect my children.  After all he is still their father and was their parent first! 

kaylee!!! when did you grow up??

Kaylee bug!! When did you grow up?? You re nine?? I must of blinked. you are such a beautiful little girl. so full of energy ,love and "spice".

Someone told me the other day that you are just delicious! and that when Heavenly Father finished making you he must of stepped back and said " I did good!" Kaylee you are my heart and I love you! you have such a passion for life. and you love deeper then anyone else I know!!

Happy birthday to my little bug! No matter how old you get you will be always be my baby!!!

oh Jaxon!!

My little Jaxon seriously! where did you come from? I think outer space!!!

"Jaxon, what is your phone number?" " E_I_E_O!!" oh buddy you are sooo funny and I love that you try to make us laugh everyday!! I know you know exactly what you are doin!!!

A Thankful Heart

I think for me being a mom is going to be the hardest most rewarding job I will ever have. Think about it. If we got paid for all the crap we do.......Man I would have more money then Mr. Monopoly. I am a chauffer( is that how you spell it?) a chef, a therapist, an EMT, seamstress, teacher, friend, problem solver. And that is just for the kids!! Who am I kidding the same applies for my husband.


This all being said. I am still soo happy to do it. And a lot of the time do all this without a thank you. But today I got my Thank you in a big way. Today was our primary program. For those who don't know what this is. Its where the sweet primary age children get to share through song what they have been learning about all year. This year our theme is . Be Excited About Reading Scriptures. I feel like I got more out of this theme then they did. It is hard to find that desire to sit and read when life is making you crazy. Lately I have only been turning to my scriptures when life seems to hand me a bunch of Lemons. I should be turning to them more often then I do. So, that when life does hand me these freakin lemons. I wont want to squirt them in someones eye. Instead I will want to make lemonade.


When those little chickens stood up and BELTED out those songs, and SHOUTED eternal truths into the microphone it made my heart happy. Not only were these kids singing, they were streghthening many testimonies of those that were in attendance. Mine included. This is very reassuring to a mother of two busy kids, that when all is said and done they do listen. When It counts.
A big thanks to all the primary leaders. You are amazing!!

My Teacher said.....

So, little man you are 4 today. I am soo grateful for you. Everyday you make me laugh, cry,wonder and sometimes even make me want to kill you. I still would not trade you in or sell you to the Gypsies, even though I threaten too. So, I was talking to my mom and she said your kids are soo funny you should really be writing this stuff down. so here goes.
"Jaxon did you eat a whole pat of butter out of the fridge?" "mom, my primary teacher said that my body is a temple." "That's right buddy,do you know what that means?' "nope! but, the temple sure likes butter!" How do you argue that??

" Jaxon you better move your butt or I am going to kick it! cause you know buddy butts are for kicking!" "Mom....... butts are for pooping!"

Jaxon,please don't sit there and whine, just go clean your room." "Mom, I'm not sitting and Whining I'm standing and Whining" How do you try to reason with a 4 yr old?? You don't. just enjoy every moment cause they will slip by fast. Happy Birthday buddy!!! I love you

I used to know her.......

So, here it is. Ryan and I have been together for 11 years. we have 2 kids. Kaylee and Jaxon. We live across the street from my big brother and big sister. My parents as well as Ryan's are less then 10 min away. Ryan has an awesome job that pays him well. I am able to stay home with our kids. The good life Right?? of course. however, life does something to you while you are not really paying attention. Somewhere in the midst of creating this beautiful life, I lost some of myself. Now don't misunderstand me. I am happy. I love Ryan , my kids etc... The weirdest thing happened though. I was outside watching my kids play on the slip and bleed. (oops slide:) for the 100 time this summer. and I thought" I miss me" What does that mean? I am right here I thought. I have along the way lost the part of me that makes me me I thought to myself. so, naturally I decided to talk to my husband about it. We were up late one night having one of those long talks about everything and nothing. MMM I love those nights :). anyway so here goes. " Hunny am I different??"" What? "he said. " Different. like not even a glimpse of who I once was?". To which he says "Of course not you're beautiful. ""Thank you :) "not what I asked. didn't really think you thought I was unattractive. (now I have that to think about) jk. He said "we are both different. we have to be,its been 11 years since we met" OK clearly I am on my own in this thought process. I am not really sure the answer that I was looking for from him. but, apparently that wasn't it. So a lot of changes have been happening in my life. for one.. I am going to put this fairly blunt. I was pregnant,now I am not. I hate it. I hate every thing about it. I want to try again . Ry does not. but, then there is another part of me that thinks. OK now you can get refocused on you. Find that spunky energetic size 8 chick who loved to try new things. and when you are blessed with the chance to have another child it will just happen. I realize that my thoughts are kinda scrambled today. but, such is my life. be patient with me while I untangle this knot. My goal is to remember me and include her in my current life. cause I don't want to say when I look in the mirror"I used to know her" I want to say " I am glad your back"

Rearview mirrors

this morning I read a quote that really made me think. "sometimes God reveals Himself in rear view mirrors" think about it when you are driving how often do you look in your rear view mirror? Yes there are the obvious when changing lanes etc etc... But so many times SO many are much more focused on the road ahead ONLY. We often forget to look back. have you ever had a trial SO big that you don't know how you will ever survive? And then somehow we come out a lot stronger then we ever thought possible. This is called the refiners fire. Got to say sometimes not a big fan of fire. Then we find ourselves saying how did we make it through? this is the time to look back into your "rear view mirror" you will find that there are all these little steps that may seem SO insignificant at the time but, were really key in helping us through. God placed these "stumbling" blocks. and it is our job to use them as stepping stones. I have truly been blessed in my life, and I am guilty of not looking in my "rear view mirror" to see that God was with me the whole time.

Dear God,

Please help me to find peace. Please help me to tolerate others. please help me to be more Christlike even when I really would rather be mean. Please help me to find forgiveness for those that wrong me. please help me to find my faith. Please help me to remember that Home is where my Family is. I know this list is long. but, trust me you know the list in my heart is much much longer. I want to thank you for being in my life. for reminding me everyday that there is good still in this world. By giving me sunshine through the clouds, children's I love yous, All the love it love its I can stand. sweet nieces and nephews hugs that melt my heart. a sisters text that makes me feel at peace. A father that reminds me to hold to my faith. and my husband who constantly brings me back to my faith when I fall. love, me

My family man

There is a Song written by Craig Campbell. and the very first time I heard it I swear it was written with my husband in mind.

I've been working as a temp

At the local factory

I hope they hire me on full time

I've got shoes to buy

and mouths to feed.

I drive a buy here pay here truck

it ain't new, but it is for me

it ain't much but it fires right up

and gets me from A to B.

What puts the dirt underneath my nails

What keeps the calluses on my hands

Family Man

They're a world my world revolves around

my sacred piece of solid ground

The flesh and Bone that gives me strength to stand

They are a fire in my driving on

the drive behind my coming home

the living, breathing, reason that I am

a Family Man.

There's dirty shirts to wash

Dishes in the sink to do

And there's how many times

does 17 go in to 52

there's bedtime prayers to pray

Sleep tights and I love you's

And then there's a pair of eyes

I get to lose myself into.

What keeps me keeping the faith

What makes me believe I can

Family man

They're a world my world revolves around

my sacred piece of solid ground

the flesh and bone that gives me strength to stand

they are a fire in my driving on

the drive behind my coming home

the living breathing reason that

I am

A Family Man

There's a fire in my driving on

the drive behind my coming home

The living, breathing, reason that I am

A Family Man

A Family Man.

This song is my Ryan from start to finish. I am soooooooo happy that he wanted to marry me. that we have the most beautiful babies together. He is my love my best friend. he is my Family Man. I love you baby!!!!

The tooth fairy needs a better Job

So, in my house we have an 8 yr old who is going to make the little tooth fairy go broke! It seems like as soon as the first tooth fell out they have all seemed to follow suit. I (the tooth fairy) have had to remember to keep cash on hand. Cause the kids don't take plastic. Anyway the first tooth= 5 bucks. I know all of you are freaking out!! All we got was a quarter or two. but, let me tell you this......the tooth fairy across the street is handing out 20's. and the neighbor kids talk!! maybe there should be a meeting of the toothfairys before I have another conversation that goes like this. "Mom, I got 2 bucks for my tooth. " hunny,that's great!" 'not really, I think the tooth fairy needs to get a better job" Whats better then a tooth fairy?? I think it would be great. you get to fly around sneek into houses and leave a little cash for the little ones. however there is a huge downside! Having to haul all those nasty little teeth around. Anyway, My little kk lost yet another tooth. (crap! I only have a few quarters) she will understand right? Next morning after she left for school I found a little note on her bed addressed to the tooth fairy

Dear Tooth fairy,
I really wanted 10 dollars for my tooth.
I want to buy an art kit.
could you please try harder next time?

love kaylee


Some day she will understand. I love my sweet girl. Oh how her little mind works.

Picture it

Picture it....... Another friday out of school.....house quiet....me, just laying peacefully in bed with my eyes not yet open. Then, the silence broken by a whisper in my ear. " this is your conscience.....wake up and feed your kids..... Oh my crazy KK I love you.

Be Still

This month has been really busy..... CRAZY... is more like it.But, in all of this one scripture has been with me. Psalms 46:10 " be still, and know that I am God" It reminds me that If I can just slow down and be still for a moment. I remember He is always there. I just need to quiet my soul so I can hear.

HALLOWEEN DISNEY STYLE

car ride to Disneyland...not tooo bad. Thank heaven for ipods and dvd players.

World Of Color water show. worth every min waiting in line. then waiting in line again. then waiting yet again for show to start. I will do this again. simply beautiful

all the villans were out in full force. got to love the wicked queen, maleficent,haites, gov ratcliff etc... fabulous

Waiting for muppet 3d I love the muppets

We have a picture with lightning every time we come. Cant wait for cars land to open up.

Still not quite tall enough for the big rides. come on half an inch!!

Even the tram ride route is decorated. Disney thinks of everything

Seriously this was someones costume. AWESOME!!!!!!!!! He was riding in a wheelchair with a life size coffin on top and he was the head and the rest was stuffed.

disney halloween parade. one of the perks for paying for the festivities

All halloween decorations were soo cute. even popcorn containers looked like this

Waiting for the fireworks and the parade

Kaylee waiting too but, totally fell asleep on mainstreet waiting. guess we are having way too much fun

More awesome random people costumes

My little trick or treaters gettin ready for the party to start

YUP even Ghostbusters party with the mouse






CLASSIC










mainstreet all decked out halloween fall style

Could not leave the park until I had my fav treat. mickeys premium ice cream head. MMMM

TOON TOWN. Dont really love it here. what we do for our kids.....
Last night in Disneyland. dont worry we will be back...sooner then we know


SOO CUTE

TOO FUNNY> read it if you can. " by order of the Toon town power company, opening this door is absolutely,positively and unquestionably forbidden. Unless you really feel like it."



NIghtmare before Christmas themed Haunted mansion






DISNEY WAS TRUELY WICKED FUN!!! If you ever can I highly recomend going soooo worth it

I love Halloween. I always have. no doubt about it. all the weirdos make me feel...well, comfortable. It makes me laugh at the creativity of some costumes and of course lets not forget the classics. This year Ryan decided to take us all to Disneyland to find out how Mickey celebrated all hallows eve. Well, let me just say this...PARTY!!!!!!! Way fun. We are going to do that again. the decorations are awesome.The characters are all in the coolest costumes. And oh The TRICK OR TREAT HALLOWEEN PARTY WAS THE BEST!!. yes it cost a lot of extra money but, soooo worth it. lights special effects on castles fog machines and awesome Halloween music. People wearing the most fabulous costumes ever and more candy then you could eat in a year. we will definitely be doing that again.

I can't take it any more!!

just cant stand it its been since may and I am totally missing it like crazy. So, naturally the bast way to cure this addiction is to give it what it wants. So, we are outta here!!! DISNEYLAND HERE WE COME!!!!! P.S. please don't tell my kids..... They really have no idea this time. hee hee hee hee hee hee M...I....C....K....E....Y........M........O........U.....S.......E......!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

To my surpirse

to my surprise I woke up this morning to 2 kids calling me mom. Wait!what?? who are these people?? I just dear johned my missionary for my sexy hott boyfriend Ryan. I still have nice boobs and a great butt. I wonder what ryan wants to do after I get off work tonight??...........But, wait I just looked into the mirror and remembered that I am 30, (ahhhhhhh) but, these people belong to me. they are my beautiful kids. I remember now!!!Their names are kaylee and jaxon. now who is the father??...... Wait that sexy man in the other room watching the utes game is Ryan he is my husband. to my dismay the mirror is a full length mirror...Where is my great butt?? my boobs ??.oh well who cares. I may not be 20 anymore but, to me that is not what is important. I love these 2 kids that insist on waking me up at the crack of dawn, my husband whos kisses can still leave me breathless and giggly like it was our first . this is my life and yes I am 30 and it can only get better from here.

Going all Vampire

So I will be honest I read the first book in the twilight series. It sucked. Needy vampires, clingy girls, wanna be cool people, I thought I finished High school. no offense to all you weirdos who liked the books to you I say"bless your hearts" Only a few of you know how funny that really is. My kids and I decided to walk to the park yesterday and have a picnic and play for a while. On the way Kaylee was talking to me about a boy that she has a crush on at school. She said "mom he was wearing a yellow shirt on the fun run so I could easily spot him."" I had to be careful though ,cause I almost went all Vampire on him" You want to suck his blood? I asked. ( wow if that is true you are a lot freakier then I thought) "no mom, I was going to kiss him. Oh well so if that is the case when your dad gets home I am going to go all vampire on him!! "" mom, please let that be the end of your story"

I wish Santa were real

so, my husband has dreams that most men do. New tools that match and are pretty and shiney. Oh and lets not forget the huge shiney tool chest with all the drawers to put all thoes tools. So we headed out to sears to look. (never to buy). As Ryan is searching the endless shelves of tools that he THINKS that he needs. One would think that over 10 yrs of building houses would provide you with enough tools to last a lifetime. Not so. anyway, so im counting up this tab and I said" 900 dollars?? and we havent even looked at thoes tool chests yet. "well too bad poodle we cant afford that. Kaylee pipes in and says" dad, just ask santa to bring it for you he has everything" Ryan mutters under his breath to me" I wish that I wasnt Santa"

A quick change of underwear

I love my kids and how their little minds work. Oh to be a chld and see just how simple life can be.
We are heading to Disneyland this saturday for a much needed vacation. Truth be told I am more excited about it then my kids are. Anyway, we have been counting down the days before we leave and last night I was drying kaylees hair and I said" only 4 more days !!!" and kaylee said "well, we actually leave tomorrow!, cause I put on my saturday underpants " I wish I could change the days as quick as a change of underpants.

Deal or no Deal

Saturday night was starting to wind down and we were all a little tired. Ry was playingX-box and I was watching some mindless t.v. I decided to get out our Deal or no Deal game for the DVD. I called for kaylee cause well, frankly I was to lazy to get up. i wanted to play the 2 player version with her. so i explained it to her : "okay so, you know the show that we sometimes watch ?? ya!! okay, it is just like that, so the whole idea is to see how much money we can win. we pick cases and then decide DEAL OR NO DEAL. Kaylee:" well I have already decided I'm not taking less then 452,000". Mom:" we haven't even started yet". Kaylee:" I know I just want what I want". Mom: "well I cant argue that kind of logic". Any way I went first and right away knock out the million dollar case. (Like the title says that's how I roll) anyway kaylee was doing great so the time came to pick either the case you picked @ the beginning of the game or to switch. My choices were 100,000 dollars or 75'000 . kaylee had a choice between 25.00 or 400.000 bucks we made our fate full decisions and I walked away with 100,000 and kaylee with 400,000. so we laughed and turned off the game and Kaylee says: so, 400,000 dollars huh?? well, when will they be delivering the money??? Well it is my fault I did say it is just like the game on TV. If this is how things work then the monopoly guy owes me billions!!!!!

Is it okay to laugh @ church??

okay so here it goes Chrissy this is just for you !!!!!
so For the past 2 years I have been blessed to live directly across the street from my big brother and big sister. Yes I know what you are all thinking.... are you starting a cult?...and you would be right!! but, if you are thinking of joining we will make you eat a raw chicken on your first visit. So, living by the sibs has its benefits, like always having someone to sit by at church. which as you all know that means double the children and of course more snacks to go around. but, with all of this closeness comes complete and utter chaos. for example: My sister little guy was playing with a plastic woody doll.( you know the one from Toy Story) anyway Right away I make an obsrevation that this particular woody doll has by far the biggest boots I have ever seen!!!!! way out of porportion for the actual size of the doll. So, naturally I start to quietly laugh ....lean foreward over the pew and say "man!!!!! that doll has some big ol boots." and my sister without turning her head says: "well, you know what they say....the bigger the boots..." so i chuckle to myself and My sweet little daughter says" mom, so the bigger the boots the bigger the woody?" well..... Ha ha I could not help myself . so to avoid being stared at by the other members in the congregation our whole 2 rows put there heads down and start doing that bobbing up and down laugh. Of course the kids have no idea why the adults are laughing. And I would like to keep it that way. Why do all the best gut busting laughs happen at the quietest times during church?? Because God has blessed us with the gift of laughter. now my dirty mind ..... well, that is all my sisters fault. ( did you honestly think I was going to take the blame for laughing in church??)